Classification: TRHA

Rating: Looks like it's going to have to be NC-17 for raw footage.

Summary: What a long, strange trip it's been...and it's only been four days.

Spoilers: None here!

Disclaimer: Not mine, not yours, and we're not even sure about this, but
1013 Productions and Fox Television claims they belong to them. But I'm
having too much fun to send them home right now.
 

Monstrum Horrendum, Informe, Ingens

"Meanwhile the suitors had got underway
Planning the death-plunge for Telemakhos
Between the Isles of Ithaka and Same
The sea is broken by an islet, Asteris,
With access to both channels by a cove.
In ambush here that night the Akhaians lay."

Homer, "The Odyssey," Fitzgerald Translation, Book 4, Lines 896-901. Used without permission.
 

August 5, 1999

We paid our check and left the restaurant. As soon as we hit the parking lot, we burst out in a fit of giggles.

"I'm not sure what's so funny, but I can't stop laughing," I choked out. We giggled all the way back to Caesar's. We managed to be straight faced in the lobby, but as soon as the elevator door closed, we burst out laughing again. We were still laughing and hugging each other mightily as we hit the floor we were on.

Thanks to Byers' prodigious abilities at blackjack, we had received an upgraded room; Byers was not going to share a suite with us, thank you very much, but he was generous in letting us take the room upgrade.

We got in the room and fell on the bed, still laughing and embracing with all our might. Finally we managed to settle down a bit, if only because we were totally out of breath. We fell into a very long, very deep kiss, and we didn't break it for ages.

"So what should we do first?" Langly asked.

"Meaning what, babe?" I kissed him again.

"Well, like, do we go find Byers and tell him the news, do we call Frohike and tell him the news, do we call Miranda and tell her the news, do we hunt down your kid brother and tell him the news, or do we just stay here and initiate the engagement with some really serious sex?"

"Hmm. That's a tough one. I'll go with the-" I closed my eyes and pretended eenie, meenie, minie, moe-I'll go with the really serious sex to initiate this engagement."

It was absolutely incredible. It was like seeing each other in a new way. And it felt right, and it felt wonderful. I was floating. We explored and devoured each other, wrapping bodies around souls, all of it soaked in a delight I had not anticipated. I could smell his sweat, taste his lips, feel the texture of his skin, and hear the low moans he made when ecstasy
threatened to overtake him. I savored the sight of each inch of pale skin, some of it now marked with some scarring from being sunburned, became aware of the location of each hair, how different it felt on each part of him.

"Mmm. You really said yes."

"Yes, babe, I did. And I meant it."

"Never thought I'd marry anyone."

"Why's that?"

"Never thought I'd trust anyone enough."

"Well, I'm honored. And ecstatic."

"I'm scared to death."

"What're you scared of?" I had his head in my hands, stroking one cheek gently.

"Oh, everything. Nothing. I dunno. This is just...so weird."

"Are you sorry you asked?"

"No! Not that! I'm just scared, that's all. I'm not used to being close to anyone. It sort of freaks me out sometimes."

"Well, babe, you're about to get a lot closer. Come here." I moved him on top of me and savored the way his weight fell on me. He began to moan softly again, and I opened my legs for him.

"Oh God you're so warm don't let me go please don't let me go," he whispered fiercely.

"Babe," my own breathing was catching now, "I'm here, I have you, and I won't."

With that, I watched his face contort into a mask that straddled the line of pleasure and pain, and I felt him filling me up, felt every ounce of life and energy in him pour into me. He held onto me as if for dear life, and I clutched him the same as he took me with him.
 

"Hey." He had dozed, as was his SOP, and I brushed his eyelashes.

"Mmm. Hey." He blinked drowsily at me and smiled. He always looks so young and so vulnerable at moments like this, I can scarcely believe he's 36 years old.

"You still scared?"

"Oh yeah."

"You don't need to be, babe." We curled into each other tightly. Being so short, I could spoon right into him with ease.

"Easy for you to say. You did this married thing before, and you were good at it. I'm a virgin at this." That made me chuckle.

"You'll be fine, babe. If I didn't think you'd make a good husband, I wouldn't marry you. And while I was a wife before, don't forget I've never been your wife. So I'm just as much a virgin at this as you."

He snuggled up some more and played with my hair. "Too bad Miranda didn't get your hair."

"She has beautiful hair."

"Yeah, but I like yours."

"Hey, I think you've got the most good hair days of any of us, babe. Were you real white-haired when you were little?"

"Yeah, real white. Major towhead."

"I was redder when I was little. I've faded out since I've gotten older. I think I have a few greys lurking in there."

"Where?" He started fingering my hair strands more separately.

"One here at the temples, that I know about." I lifted up my hair on the right side to show it.

"I can't see it."

"I'm not going to press it, then." I laughed. "I love you, Ringo Langly."

"And I love you, Ally Gerstein. Are you still gonna use Gerstein?"

I shook my head. "Nope. I'm taking yours. You mind?"

"Nope. Your decision."

"Thanks, but I like to demonstrate my alliances."

"I'm not Jewish. Your mom's gonna have a cow."

"I don't care. The last one was Jewish, and she hated him anyway. Besides, why do you care what my mother thinks?"

"I don't. I just don't want her making you feel like shit."

"And deprive her of doing what she does best?" We both laughed at that.

Knock on the door.

"That's Byers, I can tell," Langly got up. "Just a minute!" he yelled. I pulled my dress back on, and he managed to work his jeans back up. "Hey Byers. What's going on?" He opened the door for him.

Byers shocked me by not appearing in his regulation suit, but rather, in pool attire. "Thought you guys might like to come down for a swim."

"Ally? Wanna go swimming?"

"Okay by me." I went to grab my gear, but Langly pulled me into him as I turned.

"Oh, and by the way, I asked Ally to marry me, and she said yes."

Now that earned a huge grin from Byers. He shook hands with Langly and leaned over and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I can't believe it. He finally did something intelligent. Congratulations to you! Perhaps you'd prefer a swim some other time?"

"No, swimming sounds great," Langly told him. "We can meet you down there."

"You'd better call Frohike first. If he's not the first to hear, he'll be very upset."

"He wasn't the first," Langly whined.

"Yes, but don't tell him that," Byers was still smiling when he left for the pool.

"I have my cell in my purse. We'll call him poolside. And then I want to call Miranda."

"Don't you think it's kind of late to be calling her?"

"Langly, this is Miranda, the original night owl kid! And if I don't act like she's the first to hear, she's really going to be pissed!"
 

We met Byers down at one of the pools, where he was swimming laps with no fear of the sun cooking him. I flipped open my cell and dialed Frohike.

"Lone Gunmen."

"Frohike, it's us."

"Allison, my dear! I was worried about you when I didn't hear from you earlier."

Oops. We'd forgotten to call in. "I'm sorry about that, Frohike, but it's been sort of crazy here."

"It's Vegas. It's supposed to be crazy. How is the convention?"

"I'm not sure. I mostly hang by the pool. Occasionally I avail myself of the free drinks, which have less taste than the water in the pool."

"And probably have less alcohol."

"Have you talked to Dana?"

"I saw them earlier tonight. They're back at their place, and she is fit to be tied. She told Mulder that if he didn't start working late again, she would kill him in cold blood and no jury in the world would convict her."

"I suspect she's pretty bored."

"I don't think bored even begins to cover it."

"Well, she wants this baby desperately, and she'll do what she needs to do."

"That she will."

"Give her my love, okay? And you can insult Mulder for me, too."

"That's easy enough."

"I also stopped by to check on your daughter and sister-in-law this evening. And Shelby, I think her name is, she was also there."

"It's more worth commenting when Shelby's not there. She has a habit lately of forgetting to go home. How are they all? I was going to call them in a little while"

"Well, Miranda and Shelby were fine. Your sister-in-law-I forget her name now-"

"Lydia."

"Lydia seems a bit upset."

"Lydia has some...problems at work."

"I see. I'll check on them tomorrow, then."

"You don't have to do that, Frohike."

"Yes, I do." His tone indicated he would brook no argument.

"I really do appreciate it. And Frohike?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Perhaps you could get Lydia to tell you what's really going on at work. She's made a lot of vague references, but nothing that can help me very much to help her. I hate to ask you to do this, but-"

"Don't be ridiculous, Allison. Of course I'll do what I can to help her. Assuming, of course, she's willing to discuss it with me."

"Can't promise you that, but I appreciate your trying."

"Not a problem, my dear."

"That's not the real reason we called, though."

"Oh?"

"No, we have something to tell you, Frohike. Langly here asked me to marry him tonight, and I said yes."

"Oh, my! You mean the boy is finally showing some sense?" This was getting to be a familiar theme. "That's wonderful, my dear. When will you make it legal?"

"We haven't gotten that far yet. But don't worry, I'm not being walked down the aisle by anyone dressed like Elvis. At least not this weekend. Besides, who's going to walk me down the aisle if you're not here?" I could feel him blushing and grinning through the phone.

"Allison, I'd be honored. Is Langly with you?"

"Yeah, he's here, and Byers is in the pool. Which do you want first?"

"Give me the dizzy blonde. I think I need to congratulate him."

"Don't be too nice, or he'll think you're about to do something evil to him. Thanks, Frohike. Love ya."

"Love you too, my dear." I handed the cell to Langly, and I decided to step into the water while he and Frohike exchanged rude banter and technospeak.

Byers pulled up alongside me on the steps, breathing hard. "I'm not as good at this as I used to be."

"Did you swim in college or anything?"

"I was on swim teams all my life since the age of four. Nowadays I don't get in the water as much as I would like. Occasionally I'll hit the pool at the Y with Mulder, but he's not been very available as of late." He brushed the water from his eyes, which I could see under the night lights were flaming red around the clear blue irises. "Allison, I just wanted you to
know that I'm very happy for both of you."

"Byers, you've been around me long enough and been a good enough friend, I think you can use my nickname."

"And I've told you before, you can call me John."

"Okay, John. I'll do that."

We could hear Langly squawking with Frohike poolside on the phone. "All right!   No! I promise!" He walked over to the stairs of the pool and handed Byers the phone. "Your turn."

Byers left the water and Langly wandered down to the deep end of the pool. Then he plunged in with a cannonball, soaking everything within firing distance and creating a monstrous wake.

"Langly, I didn't take my contacts out, so I can't really get my head wet."

"Whaddya mean, you didn't take your contacts out? How're you supposed to have any fun?"

"Well, if I can find a glass of water, I can take them out for now."

"Is there a waiter around?" We scanned the area.

"I think I'll have to go into the bar to get some. I'll be right back." I got out of the water and strolled towards the bar. I was treated to a wolf whistle delivered by a blonde in the deep end.

"Langly, you can't see this far, and you know it!" I chided him.

"Yeah, but I can imagine."
 

I grabbed a glass of water from the bartender and decided to get 3 beers to round things out. I came back and handed out beers all around.

"Thank you," Byers popped the lid on his.

"Hey, cool. She'll even bring me beers!" Langly teased.

"Don't get used to it," I laughed at him.

Byers raised his Corona to us. "I'd like to propose a toast to you two. It would seem appropriate in this moment to come up with something eloquent and elegant, but I'll keep it simple. Love and happiness to you both."

"L'chaim," Langly and I clinked bottles with him.

"Yes, it is," I agreed.

August 8, 1999

By the time I woke up, I was 44 years old. The only unusual thing about that was that I was born around 1:00 in the afternoon. I would probably have slept longer had the phone not rung.

Langly was not there when I woke up, so I grabbed the phone and mumbled into it.

"Allison, my dear, what were you doing last night?" It was Frohike, clucking enviously.

"Well, I got dragged to a LAN party, which turned out to be an engagement party for us..."

"Say no more. Where would be your worse half?"

"Not sure. Want me to have him call you?"

"If you would, but I also have a message for you. It's from Agent Sternberg by way of Mulder. She'd like you to give her a call, and it was indicated that the matter was rather urgent."

I bit back the urge to say that not only was I on vacation, it was also my birthday...but Ellen wouldn't ask for something trivial. Not her style.

"Okay, I'll call her as soon as I get some caffeine into me." I had started the coffee pot after rinsing it out-I would marry Langly, but there was no way I would drink his coffee. "And I'll have Blondie call you when he steps in."

"Thank you, my dear. Oh, and happy birthday."

"You're a love, Frohike."
 

Two cups of coffee, two cigarettes and one shower later, I was ready to talk to Ellen. I dialed her at home, assuming that it being a weekend, she would be there. Her husband indicated, however, that she was in her office, and to contact her there. I could hear her two sons screaming behind him.

"Sternberg."

"Hi Ellen, it's Allison. What's up?"

"Ally, thanks for calling back so soon. I really hate to bother you on vacation, but I need some information that you might be able to help me with."

"I'll tell you what I can."

"Okay, we've been called out to investigate some mysterious illnesses in a place called the California School for the Deaf. You familiar with it?"

"There're two of them. Riverside or Fremont?"

"Fremont. Your old neck of the woods."

"I've never done any work there, it's a residential school for deaf kids, that's about all I know. You'll get to use your ASL, though."

"I hope I can remember it. I always seem to have one word in a sentence that I can't remember, and of course it's the most critical one."

"Even experienced interpreters get Maalox moments, Ellen. Don't worry about it. Most deaf people are used to having to work hard to communicate with hearing people, and they usually rapidly figure out what you're trying to say. So what's the buzz on these kids getting sick?"

"I'm really not free to say right now. I hope you understand."

"I do. I was just curious, that's all."

"Hey, by the way, congratulations. Mulder told us the news."

"I have no secrets, do I?" I chuckled.

"Honey, you don't know the half of it. And you don't want to."

"Sorry I wasn't more helpful, Ellen. I just don't really know anybody there. Residential schools are a very different world from regular universities.

"No sweat. How'd your daughter handle the news?"

"She was surprisingly subdued when I first told her, but last night, she seemed to be warming up to the idea more."

"She get along okay with him?"

"Very well. But I think this constitutes major redshift."

"Definitely. So when's the date?"

"No idea yet. No rush, I think. So how're things working out with Mark?"

"He's very quiet, and he's not the warmest guy on the planet, but I like working with him. He's got good ideas, and he's logical and detail-oriented almost to a fault. I know I can depend on him, and I think he's going to be a great partner. We're still in the getting-to-know-you stage, and you can imagine, with Mark being sort of shy and me being the biggest loudmouth known to God and man-not to mention woman-it's taking some adjustment. I respect him tremendously. I sense he feels similarly about me as well, although I think I talk too much for his tastes."

"Well, Ellen, I suspect nobody ever accused you of being the retiring types."

"I've been described a lot of ways, but that's one word I don't think I've heard used in reference to me."

"Working with Mulder okay? You really haven't said."

"That's because I'm finally alone in the office for a little while, which is rare. Mulder is brilliant and knowledgeable and amusing as hell. He does tend to micromanage, though, which drives me nuts. I wish he'd let Mark and me run with this one, but he's planning to go out to Fremont as well."

"Dana's probably going to kill him."

"Ally, Dana is going to kill him if he doesn't leave her alone some! He tries to micromanage her pregnancy as well. Honestly, you'd think it was him doing the carrying, not her! But he's sort of cute in that way-you can tell how terribly concerned he is and how much he cares for her and the baby. I just wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of it sometimes, that's all."

"I suspect yours was not that way?"

She laughed raucously, that loud yet peculiarly melodic laugh she possessed. "Ally, he was in the middle of a sick call when I went into labor with Gabriel. I had to hunt him down all over the place to find him! Which is how it pretty much went through both pregnancies. You want a quiet life and a husband who's around when you need him, don't marry a rabbi."

"Ellen, you'd never be able to stand a quiet life."

"And I'd probably have murdered long ago if he hovered over me. I've been a cop since I finished college, and if he's going to worry about me every time I stub my toe, he'd have had a nervous breakdown long ago."

"How's the workload without Dana?"

"We've got to get another warm body in here, and they're sending us one in about a week or so."

"Do you know him?"

"Yep. Name's Jeffrey Spender. I personally think he's an officious little prick."

"But Ellen, tell us what you really think!" We both howled.

"I'll be able to work with him, no problem. I don't have to love him. Hey, and I spend our lives dealing with every kind of sickness of body and soul and society. I hardly think working with a jerk constitutes a problem. I knew this job wasn't for the faint of heart when I took it, and it'll be okay."

"I don't know, Ellen, he might find out how faint of heart HE is when he starts working with you."

She definitely appreciated that. "Are you implying that I come on rather strong, Ally?"

"No, Ellen, I'm not implying anything, I'm saying it to your face!" We howled some more. "Anyway, Superman just came back, I'm going to go and collect on my birthday treats."

"Today's the day? Well, happy happy! Raise a few drinks for me. God knows I won't be having any!"

"When do you have to go to Fremont?"

"In about six hours. Happy happy joy joy."

"You watched Ren & Stimpy?"

"Every chance I got."

"Yeah, me too."

"All right, another woman of highly questionable taste! I love it! Anyway, when you get back, and I get back, and in the remote event we get caught up here, I'm dragging you out for some birthday cheer. Preferably the kind that's got alcohol in it!"

"Can't wait. Ellen, good luck in Fremont."

"Thanks, I'll gave the Bay Area a hug for you. Isn't that what you do in California?" She chortled loudly at her own comment.

"When we're not shooting." We were laughing when we hung up.

"Hey, birthday girl!" Langly walked in holding a huge basket of what looked to be western wildflowers. "These are for you." He shifted nervously from one foot to another. "I didn't know what to get...Roses just seemed so...clichéd."

I would have been thrilled with anything he gave me, cliched or not. And these were beautiful. I kissed him enthusiastically, and he almost fell over.

"You look like you're hung over as hell," I commented.

"I think I'm actually partied out."

"You, Ringo Langly? Partied out?" I laughed.

"We've spent the last two nights partying our brains out, gettting toasted by sickos we barely know, and then there was this morning..."

"What happened this morning?"

He collapsed on to the bed, moaning a bit. "Hope you brought some Tylenol."

"I did." I grabbed my purse and pulled out several capsules. "Here." He gulped them down and laid back again, closing his eyes.

"I've been out for quite a while. I got woken up at 10 minutes to 8."

"God, and we didn't get to bed until 6."

"Tell me about it. Anyway, it was so...surreal. I keep hearing this banging, I'm sure it's my head, but I get up and answer the door anyway."

"Were you decent?" I laughed.

"Barely. I grabbed the one of the blankets and wrapped it around myself. So I answer the door, thinking if nobody's there, it's not gonna matter because somebody is going to burn for this. But there're these two guys here. Two suits. I'm like, "What!" And they're like, "Mr. Langly, we'd like to talk to you if we could."

"Should've told them you were Dr. Langly."

"If my brain had been functioning, I might, but anyway, they show me some ID, they're from the fucking Pentagon."

"Oh, fuck."

"My reaction exactly. So I'm like, what the hell do you want to talk about? And I'm thinking, shit, I'd better get a lawyer or something. So they're like, look, don't be scared-yeah, right!-and they say, we just want to talk to you about some...possibilities.

"I'm like, what sorts of possibilities? And they're like, we'd like you to come to breakfast with us. And I say, I'm not exactly ready to go, you know. And they're like, okay, meet us in an hour.

"So I have no idea if these guys are for real or not. So I go and fucking wake up Byers-amazing, the one time I need him and he's sleeping-and I'm like, I'm not talking to anyone till I check these bastards out. And we call Frohike, and Frohike's pissed because he was sleeping."

"By the way, you need to call him back," I reminded him.

"Yeah, yeah. Probably wants to lecture me on my bad manners."

"Somebody has to."

"So it turns out these turkeys are the real deal. At least, they have verifiable employment. So I take a shower and try to wake up, and then I remember I lost my glasses, which really sucks because I can't see anything, but I go down anyway, and they find me. I'm really worried 'cause I have, you know, history, and I'm worried they...hey, you can't be too careful.

"So I tell Byers to get his ass up and he comes and follows me down, sits on the other side of the restaurant-by the way, he's got your cell phone, I took it to be safe-and I have a conversation with these weirdos."

"Who are these weirdos?"

"They're intelligence. Cryptography and stuff."

"Whoa."

"Yeah. And I'm thinking, I really did have too much tequila last night. And all the time, I'm ready to toss my cookies all over them."

"So what'd you say?"

"Well, I thought about it. It's definitely got advantages."

"Such as?"

"Ally, we've gotta move. We can't live at your place. I mean, the dog can't turn sideways in the living room, for God's sake."

"It is pretty small."

"We can't walk in the bedroom-"

"That's because of your stuff," I reminded him.

"And I'd be bringing more stuff! And Miranda's bedroom is so small, she and her friends always sleep down in the living room, and we can't even get in there! The place is packed! And you've got a ton of shit in storage!"

"Costs a lot of money to move, and I'm not rolling in it right now."

"Exactly. We could use the scratch. And this will be reasonably decent scratch."

"I hope you're not just doing it for the cash, Langly. This better be something you really want to do, because I'm not about to put up with you bitching and moaning you hate your job."

"And being in the Pentagon, in intelligence...I can see what's happening from the inside!"

"You'd better be really careful there, babe. What happens to you and your job when your great discovery is found in the next issue of TMB?"

"Hey, they asked me."

"I'm assuming they know all about TMB."

"Yeah, but they underestimate how many people take us seriously...which is exactly what I want them to think."

"They can also deny everything."

"They can deny it, but can they make it untrue?"

"That's a philosophical construct, babe, one you are much better prepared to rationalize than I am."

I shifted a bit. "Langly honey, this makes me a bit uneasy. I'm not sure why, but if this is what you want to do, then go for it. Just make sure you do it because you want to and it's right for you. Don't do it just because of Miranda and me."

"I'm not. I mean, I wanna do it for you and Miranda, but I think-"

"Langly, you told me after you finished your federally funded vacation, the CIA approached you, and you said no way did you want to work for the spooks."

"I failed to recognize how valuable it would be to go inside at the time. Besides, this is the Pentagon, not Langley."

"I'm not sure I can make that fine a distinction, babe. It scares me a little. But go for it. I'll support you all the way."

"Cool. And then you know what?"

"What, sweetheart?"

"I puked all over the table."

I raised an eyebrow. "Is there supposed to be some poetic justice in this?"

He laughed. "Could be."

Ringing phone. Probably Frohike looking for Langly. I picked up.

"Mommy?" I heard Miranda's voice come through the line, and her tone made me very uneasy.

"Miranda honey, what's up?"

"Mommy, please, you've got to come home right now!"

"Sweetie, even if I got on a plane this second, it would take me at least four and a half hours to get back!"

"Mommy, please, I'm not kidding! Get on the plane as soon as you can! Please!"

"Where's Aunt Lydia, honey?"

"Mom, Aunt Lydia's gone!"

"What do you mean, she's gone?"

Miranda started to cry. "Last night, Auntie was going to the video store and to pick up some Chinese for Shelby and me and her. She said she was only going to be gone about 45 minutes."

I went ice cold. "Last night? What the hell time did she leave?"

"Around 7:30."

"Honey, why didn't you call last night?"

"We thought she'd be back...and it's your birthday and I didn't want to spoil-"

"Fuck my birthday! Did you call the police?"

"I did, but they say she's not missing until she's been gone 24 hours!"

I was furious. Here were minor children and the police wouldn't even check this out...

"Miranda, we're packing now and going to the airport. I'll call you when I know what flight we'll be on.   And one more thing, sweetie. Get the hell out of the house. Go to Shelby's. Call Shelby's mom or sister and have them come and get you. Or go to Sarah's, but don't go anywhere else. And don't open the door for anyone!" I slammed down the receiver and began to
gather my things together rapidly. "Langly, get it together. Vacation's over and we're out of here. Now."

END OF PART 21