Rating: PG-13. Ally and Langly allude to doing the nasty, and Michael keeps wishing.

Summary: New semester...and a birthday.

Spoilers: Nah.
 

January 8, 2001

I had to cut my class load from four classes to three. With the number of tutoring hours I've got to put in, there's no way. I dropped my physics section-I think Ally was hoping I could help her in the class, but there's no way. So I'm left with the second half of calc, advanced comp, and Visual C++, which should be cake-I've done Visual C++ stuff.

I draw a better calc instructor this time-he's breathing, at least. Occasionally his voice even changes pitch. Visual C++, the guy is from India, he's a little hard to understand, but he's pretty cool, and I tell him I know most of the stuff and I'm just taking it for credit, and he says that's cool, I still have to do the work, but I can work on other stuff that's more advanced if I want.

In my copious free time. Right.

I didn't know who I was getting for advanced comp-it said 'staff' in the online directory-so who should I draw but the lovely Ms. Steinert. Or should I say, Dr. Steinert. She apparently passed her orals and now all she has to do is get the piece of paper that says she did it.

She says she didn't know she was teaching the class until three days before it started-she usually only does the beginner sections-but I guess the originally scheduled instructor bailed.

And I thought she was a demanding bitch in the first section. Not as many assignments in this one, but they're a lot more complicated, lots more research. And she still expects you to keep journaling.

My journaling suffered a lot last semester, but she seemed to like it, anyway. So I'm not gonna stress big over that.

Not when I've got so many other things to stress over.

Kelly's doing four classes-second half of calc, although again she's not in my section, it conflicted with her o-chem lab. She and Ally are doing the lecture together, but Ally doesn't have to do the lab sections. She's also got another bio class, with a lab, and her comp class, which she's taking with Casey.

I'd love to know what she puts in HER journal. Not that I'd ever get a chance to see it; I don't think Kelly would share it with me. I don't know why.

Maybe because I know I wouldn't show her mine.

After doing it, I sort of appreciate how ballsy it was of Ally to even offer to show me hers.

Of course, it was ballsy of me to steal the whole thing from her.

So I'm working 20 hours a week tutoring. And I keep promising I'll do some writing for TMB.

About the only way this is going to happen is if I combine my writing assignments with writing for the magazine; I hope some of this will work out. Otherwise, I'll have time to study (a little) and sleep pretty much.

And be with Kelly. I don't care how much I have to do, I'm going to be with Kelly.

She's having a rough go. She's kind of nervous on her new job, she's got a lot to learn and she still makes a lot of mistakes, but I bet she gets over that in a hurry. She's a brainy girl, she can do it.

Ally worries that she's not gonna be able to handle her course load like she is right now. I worry about it, too, but I think Kelly can do it. I'll make sure she can do it.

How I plan to accomplish this, I have no idea.

And her birthday's in five days, and I have no idea what to get her, and I'm freaking.

And to just put the icing on the cake, I've got another cold, which is freaking my dad out, and he's thinking I should really cut back for a while and blah blah blah...

Not gonna happen, Dad.

Besides, I have to see Bergman again on Friday-I'll be real happy when this is not a regularly scheduled program anymore-and I'm not gonna die before then.

Plus I still have to shop for a car. I was gonna do this over break, but needless to say, this didn't exactly work out. Kelly's been coming to get me, but our class schedules don't match, and her car's kind of on its last legs. You can take the bus from Ally and Langly's but it's a real pain, and there's no way I'm gonna make her do THAT.

I mean, what kind of sleazeball do you think I am?

Don't answer that.

It's sort of funny with things going on, the people helping us the most seem to be Juliet and the prof. Juliet and Kelly talked a few times, and I think it helped Kelly see somebody who went through a sort of similar experience and came out okay. And the prof is just like, if you're not okay, well, I won't bug you about it, but you can come to me and I've got the time. Even
though he's back teaching his classes, the couple times I needed to ask him stuff or talk to him about something, he just sort of is there. And he doesn't make a big deal out of it. I mean, Langly really doesn't either, but with the prof, it's sometimes sort of nice because I don't think the prof is always trying to get my dad's attention like Langly is, and as an older brother figure, he's more manageable.

Of course, he can't shoot pool, so Langly still has snaps there. Not that I'll have time to play this semester.

But I don't care, I got to get Kelly a perfect birthday gift. It's this weekend, and it's got to be perfect.

I don't even know where to start. I shopped with Ally at Christmas, but she's not much help there; Ally hates shopping. I lucked into finding Casey, and I scored on that-Kelly was real happy about her gift, so I felt good-but I don't even know where to start this time, and I don't want to do the Borders thing again.

Oh God. I may actually have to ask...Miranda.

Miranda is a pain in the ass, but she is the goddess of the mall. And I got to admit, she knows how to pick out gifts. She gave me this navy blue flannel shirt at Christmas, and it's the greatest thing. She gets her sizes right, and she picks nice stuff. And Ally says she knows how to get bargains.

Depends on what you call a bargain.

I had to get all my own books again, Dad was going to get them for me but I suckered him into getting me contact lenses, so I kind of shot my wad there. It's not so bad this time-same calc text, and since Ally doesn't have to do the second half of the sequence, she hands it over to me. I think Langly might actually have the Visual C++ book, I'll have to raid his library,
maybe even my dad has it, although Dad's more C and C++ based, not the visual version.

Hey, give the guy credit for getting beyond FORTRAN. I mean, he's old.

I don't like to think about that. I want to think my dad will live at least as long as I need him.

Which should be, by my estimations, about forever.
 

January 12, 2001

I've put this off long enough. It's Kelly's birthday tomorrow, and I gotta go shopping.

This thought scares the hell out of me.

I'd almost rather get bashed by Troy again than deal with the mall.

Well, almost. And I can say this now because he's in jail, where he belongs.

I still seem to get a lot of headaches since then, though. A little souvenir of my close encounter with him.

I plan to make him pay, whatever way I can.

It's the way to make him do it that's causing me problems.

And I know if he ever even gets near Kelly again, I will kill him.

If anybody ever tries to hurt her, they will die.

I can't help feeling this way.

Kelly says she's okay, and she doesn't need to be protected, but it's like, at least when I tell Dad and Langly and the prof, they get it. Dad says it's just wound up in the male DNA, the urge to protect women. And the prof tells me privately that even though women balk at it-it is, after all, the 21st century-he thinks they do find a weird comfort in it.

Men may have the protection genes, but Ally notwithstanding, I think women have the shopping genes. Time to see if Miranda is around.
 

Miranda's at Shelby and her sister's and Ally gives me the number to call over there. I luck out, they're planning a mall expedition, and Shelby's sister Mary even offers to come get me.

Miranda was even nice about it. She didn't start off her conversation with, "What do you want now?"

Dad's getting ready to hit the offices, and he tells me I need to stay in today, particularly if I'm intent on going out tomorrow. I'm taking Kelly to Bustamante's for dinner, and I don't care if I'm dying. I remind him I don't have a present for her yet, and he kind of rolls his eyes, but he says don't stay out long.

My turn to roll my eyes. Jesus, he is overprotective! Bergman says I only have a cold, and he's not giving me anything for it right now, but I STILL have to go back next week.

I think Blue Cross hates me, since I seem to cost them money all the time. This thought warms my heart a bit. I like the idea I'm not one of their profit centers.

I met Mary once before, seems like a nice lady. Miranda and Shelby are having a giggle fest in the back seat. Wonderful.

Miranda says not to worry, we'll find the perfect gifts for Kelly. Guess she's getting her something, too. Miranda says it's a lot more fun to have Kelly there than it was to have me there.

Thank you, Miranda. You do wonders for a guy's confidence.

I have no idea how Jesse puts up with her, but he's a better man than me. Plus, he has to put up with Langly treating him like shit, and I don't know how he does that, either.

And I asked this girl to shop with me?

I'm truly losing my mind.
 

I really hate the mall. I'm absolutely out of my element here.

And shopping with a 15-year-old? Jesus.

Miranda drags me EVERYWHERE. She even hauls me into Victoria's Secret.

Sorry, I'm not ready for that yet. And I stick out like a boil on someone's nose in there.

And right now, I think Kelly'd be upset if I shopped here. Maybe some other time.

Besides, I could do this from home. Dad gets the catalog.

We look at jewelry, and I think about getting her a locket, but I'm not sure here. And Miranda says clothes, but that's what she's getting her, she found her a sweater, and anyway, that's not what I want.

Problem is, I don't know what it is I do want to get her.

Perfume is tricky, Miranda says, and she doesn't think Kelly wears it, and she says women are picky about what you buy them. So 86 the fragrance counter.

I don't think Kelly's got any real defined musical tastes. She doesn't even have a CD player, she listens to the radio, but I've never heard her say she liked something in particular.

Miranda says something for her room, get rid of the Motel 6 feel of the place.

I'm real tired and I'm getting a headache here. We've been at this for three hours and I'm still empty-handed. Strangely enough, Miranda's not growing real impatient like her mom does. I guess she got the two copies of the shopping gene.

We've done all the stores, both department stores-which I find frightening-and specialty ones, which are smaller but still intimidating to a guy whose genotype does not include shopping.

Still nothing. I am so fucking discouraged. Not to mention pathetic.

What kind of guy can't find a girl a gift?

Miranda wants to hit the kiosks that lurk in the middle of the mall. She says most of the good ones are closed since Christmas and Hanukkah are over, but she likes the crystal kiosk. She collects little crystal figures, among about a million other things. She says she got most of them from her grandma, and she misses her grandma. Grandma Rausch was her last grandparent, she says.

I barely remember my grandparents. I barely remember my parents from when I was little, for Christ's sake.

I'm bored to death, among other things. So I start looking at the pieces out of a lack of anything better to do. And we'll be here awhile; Miranda has to check out EVERYTHING wherever she goes.

And I see it. It's perfect.

It's a little crystal unicorn. I don't know if Kelly likes unicorns or not, but it's beautiful. It's so delicate, but when I pick it up, it's surprisingly heavy.

Miranda nods at me, gives me a thumbs up.

I have it packaged up and I pay for it.

Nothing to it.

Once you find it, that is.
 

January 13, 2001

I really wanted to see Kelly last night, but Dad was like, no way. Bastard made me go to bed at 8 fucking o'clock!

Never mind that I fell asleep right away. I wanted to go hang at Chateau Langly, where everyone else was playing cards, including Kelly. I think she wanted me to come over, too, but my dad was like, you're not better tomorrow, you're not going anywhere.

Fuck that. It's Kelly's birthday. I'm going.

Lucky she has a Sunday birthday this year, so we don't have to deal with school and work. She says she has to study in the morning, but to come over in the afternoon, and we can hang out for a while.

She's starting to sound like less of a zombie and more of a girl again. Ally says she still cries a lot, though. Juliet tells her that that's unfortunately pretty normal right now, but she thinks Kelly's doing okay. Kelly and Juliet seem to be pretty close. They talk a lot.

I mean, Kelly and me, we talk a lot, whenever we can, but I got to admit, it makes me sort of jealous.

Still, she's in a better mood.

And I'm dying to kiss her again.

We haven't had a kiss like New Year's since...well, since the night after. I've held her, and like kissed her on the cheek, but I can almost taste her mouth, I want her so bad.

I want to do a lot more than kiss her...I was hoping maybe for her birthday...but I don't think that's gonna happen.

I keep dreaming about what she looks like under her clothes, what she feels like. I bet she's real soft, judging from the skin I have touched. And I've felt those tiny breasts press into me...I'd like to see them just as they are.

On top of everything else, I am hopelessly horny.

I was so bad the other night, Dad was out and I tried raiding the collection, but it didn't do jack for me. I gave up after about five minutes.

I did remember to rewind.

I wake up knowing it's her birthday and I'm all fluttery inside. Plus, I'd be embarrassed if anybody barged in my room right now. It's that damn obvious.

I want to call her, but she's on Miranda's line, so I may have to deal with the princess first, who will no doubt be pissed up that somebody woke her up before noon.

Too bad. It's my princess's birthday, and Miranda can stuff it.

I luck out-the phone's in Kelly's room, and she picks up, and she sounds real happy to hear from me. I tell her happy birthday, and I can't wait to see her, and she says, maybe you could come over earlier, I need some help on my comp assignment and my calc homework...

Sure. I do private tutoring.

She says she played cards for a little while last night with the crowd, then Ally and Langly and Byers and my dad wanted to do bridge, so she and Juliet went and had coffee, and that was fun, and Ally got her Sumatran coffee this morning, I was the one that told Ally she likes that kind, and that made her feel really good.

And I bet Ally made her a birthday cake. I bet you money she did.

She says it's real weird having people fuss over her like this. Birthdays were no big deal in her family, she'd get a little something from her mom, and she hopes her mom remembers it's her birthday.

Much as I think her mom is a waste case, I hope she does, too. She's gonna be bummed if she doesn't.

I work at getting myself into a form where I can pass civilized into the shower, and when I come out, Dad's up, drinking coffee. I ask him if he's going to the offices, he says yeah, I tell him Kelly and me are gonna study first, can I go over with him.

He says I sound not too bad, I can go, but he says we'd better be going to dinner early.

I want to scream. He is driving me insane. It's not like I'm gonna die from this cold or anything. Hell, after having pneumonia, this is a piece of cake. I barely notice it's there.

I wish to God he'd lay off. He fusses at me for working too hard-shit, I have to, Dad, what do you expect me to do? He worries about Kelly all the time, and I think she's doing okay, and he keeps worrying-out loud, much to my aggravation-that we're gonna do something stupid. I mean, how many times do I have to be told to practice safe sex?

Particularly when I'm not getting any!

He reminds me that Ally and Langly didn't, and we all know what happened there.

Hey, do I look that stupid?

Don't answer that.
 

ALLY:

I got to play bridge last night. It was wonderful. Even if I did come in third behind Byers and Frohike. At least I can consistently beat Langly, which annoys the hell out of him.

I try not to gloat.

Kelly and Juliet seem to spend a lot of time together, and this is probably good. I'm not certain what the bond is, but they click well, and Juliet is a lot younger than I am. It seems to keep her somewhat focused. That, and loving attention from Michael, who seems to make certain she's okay at every possible moment.

I just hope she doesn't feel smothered. It's easy to feel that way in this household; you've got tons of caring people just dying to show it to you. It's wonderful, but sometimes you need to retreat.

Miranda likes having her here. They're close in age, but not so close that they would be inclined to argue, and the relationship is not what exists between her and Shelby. I don't know what Kelly thinks of Miranda, but Miranda thinks she's pretty cool.

That, and her cousin Julie, who pops up here and there. She's been trying to get a job, not with much success. She enjoys Julie-who wouldn't? I enjoy her. And Langly loves having his niece around again. Of course, one has to be willing to tolerate a great deal of regression on the part of both niece and uncle when they're together.

On the whole, Kelly is the most peaceful inhabitant of cell #2 in the dungeon that we've had. Mostly she studies, so she's quiet most of the time. She says she likes that she can study somewhere other than the library.

How this kid was able to keep the GPA she did for so many years, I have no idea.

The one person who worries me is Joan. Joan is getting to be so painfully thin, and she's still such a nervous wreck. I'm starting to wonder if it's only psychological.

Langly says she's just stressed out, but I think he's trying to convince himself as much as he's trying to convince me.

We moved Byers and Juliet yesterday-actually, they did the intelligent thing and had professional movers do it-but we came over to see if they needed help, and to babysit the cat.

Tivoli is an awesome cat. She's growing by leaps and bounds, and she tries to make you think she's so cool and sophisticated, when in fact all she wants to do is rub up against you and love you.

Sort of reminds me of Byers.

Watching Byers and Juliet with the cat is a kick. They're like two new parents the way they fuss over her, and for some reason, watching them stroke that little cat, and the way they look at each other when they do, always makes me hopelessly, inexplicably horny.

I was really grateful when everybody left last night-I couldn't get Langly to the bedroom fast enough. Fortunately, he wasn't protesting that I was mauling him, which I was-I just about ruined his clothes trying to pull them off him.

I keep telling him to give up the 501s. The buttons take too long.
 

MICHAEL:

Ally says Kelly's downstairs, I should take her another cup of coffee and take one for myself.

I can do that.

Actually, it's trickier than I thought, trying to carry Kelly's present with two mugs of coffee and not drop it. I just pray I don't fall down the steps.

I can't knock, so I call out to her and she answers the door.

She's looking a lot better. The bruises on her face are almost all clear. And I notice her lip's not split anymore. It's got a scar, but somehow, this makes her even prettier, in sort of a vulnerable way.

"Hey," she smiles. "Ready to study?"

"In a minute." Now's my chance. "Feel like a birthday kiss?"

She doesn't say anything, but I get another taste of those lips, and I don't want to let go. I could just stay like this all afternoon...or longer...

"C'mon, I need some help with my calc," she says, finally breaking the kiss.

Oh well.

END OF PART 43