Rating: PG

Summary: My salute to my students...I get to listen to them talk...and you thought we were a TV generation...

Spoilers: TV commercials.
 

"I just keep wondering, why is everybody being so nice to me?" she looks real puzzled. And she's not faking it.

"Maybe 'cause you're worth it."

"No, Michael, that's L'Oreal!" She's laughing again.

God, I love listening to her laugh.

"You know what's amazing? I hardly ever watch TV...but I know all the commercials. Is that weird?" She asks me this as she sips some water.

"Some of the commercials are the best part. Remember the Polaroid one, it was a few years back, with the dog and the cat, and the cats trash the house and the dog takes a Polaroid 'cause he knows the owner's gonna blame him? That's a cool one."

"I love that one! And there was this one for this car company, where they had this guy who lied and they'd subtitle it, and I just howled over that."

"Isuzu, I think. I used to like this one for AOL, it says, my boss thinks I'm working hard, but with America Online, I'm just goofing off! I hear a lot of bosses hated that one!"

"I remember that one! And remember the Yahoo one, where this punky guy was quilting and he finds a quilting club after all his friends make fun of him? That one's great!"

Commercials. Our shared history.

She reaches out and touches my face, and it's such a sweet gesture. Of course, she's gonna get rubbed by the legendary Frohike three o'clock shadow, but she doesn't seem to mind.

"You look so good since you got contacts. You have really beautiful eyes, you know."

"Do not."

"You do, too! I'd kill for those lashes!"

Ah, yes. My eyelashes, the envy of women everywhere. Even with glasses, you could see them.

"Don't you guys like have makeup for that sort of thing?"

"Mascara never quite comes up to the real thing."

"You don't do much makeup. I like that."

"Lip gloss. That's about it. I don't have time to spend on my appearance."

"Doesn't matter. You look great."

She blushes. "Thanks. But right now, I don't. You know I've gained seven pounds just since I moved in with Ally and Langly?"

"I like it."

"None of my clothes fit right. But it's like, there's so much good stuff there, I can't stop eating."

"I like curves." And I do. "I think Kate Moss is a freak of nature."

"She's got terrible teeth, too."

"I think women should look like women. And I think a lot of supermodels are ugly."

"The worst was when heroin chic was in style-the smudgy black eyeliner, you were supposed to look all strung out and vacant? I hated that."

"With the real messy hair? I mean, everybody gets messy hair, but like these girls look like they slept in an alleyway or something. I know girls that slept in the alley, and it's not a look I bet they'd choose for themselves."

"You said you were on the streets for a while."

"Yeah, I was. And it's not something I'd wish on anybody. It was a real bad time. But when you got no money, what're you gonna do? I'd try to get a bed at Children of the Night, but they fill up real fast."

"Yeah, I remember when I was little, my mom was on welfare for a while, we didn't have Christmas that year. I think we mostly ate baloney sandwiches on white. To this day, I can't eat baloney sandwiches on white."

"I can't eat in anyplace that smells like cafeteria food."

"I could never eat in our school caf in high school-it just looked too scary. And me, growing up on diner food." She laughs more. "It's like I need to get my daily allotment of grease to keep going."

"I get enough chocolate, I'm happy."

"Didn't know you were a chocoholic, Michael."

"Of the worst kind. I mean, it's like, I smell it, it's over."

"Chocolate's the best. You know that there's a chemical in chocolate that makes you feel like you're in love?"

"Hmm. Maybe why I haven't needed so much of it lately."

"I can do without chocolate, but coffee? No way. And living at Ally's, I've gotten so spoiled. She's always got good coffee there."

"Just don't ever drink it if Langly makes it."

"She said that, too."

"Corrodes the spoon. And your insides."

"You've had it, I take it?"

"I've made that mistake."

"So what other mistakes have you made?" She's asking me, and I can't tell if she's serious or not.

"Not ones I want to talk about," I tell her.

"Why not?"

"Because, it's embarrassing!" Jesus, what is it about women?

"Hey, it's not like I never made a mistake in my life," she's gentle about it.

"Yeah, well, I doubt you made as many as me, and if you did, they weren't so
stupid."

"How do you know?"

"Well, bet you never got caught changing your friends' grades on the school's mainframe." This is one peccadillo I'm actually proud of, so I don't mind admitting it. (And I got a Casey word in there. Do I get a point?)

"No, I can't say as I have."

"Or gotten busted for possession."

"Of what?"

"Dope. Marijuana. Magic weed."

"I didn't use it."

"Figured as much. Used to be the staff of life for me. Of course, I got a lot fatter when I was smoking it, I'd get the munchies in the worst way, I'd go and get about three shakes and down 'em all. They're just right when you're high."

"Well, you're pretty thin now."

"Yeah, well, I probably won't be for long." This as we have some stuffed mushrooms delivered to the table.   "I really pudged out at Ally and Langly's."

"Not surprising, with all the goodies around there. Ally's the ultimate Jewish mom. She's always worried you're hungry."

"This works for Langly, but the rest of us, we're doomed."

"So I've noticed." She's looking a little bummed. "God, we shouldn't have ordered the mushrooms, should we?"

"Too late to send them back now." This as I down my third one. "C'mon, help me out here."

And when the waiter asks if we want more bread, do you seriously think we said no? Get real.

She spears a couple mushrooms. Kelly likes to eat, so she better not go all wimpy on me now.

I'm calculating how many hours I had to work to pay for this dinner.

Fuck it. This is great.

"I can get used to this," she says through a mouthful of mushrooms.

"Used to what?"

"Decent restaurants. Having a computer. Intelligent people to talk to."

"Where'd you find the intelligent people?"

"Michael, you're so bad!" She tosses a breadstick at me. "I've never been around so many PhD's or MD's in my life. In fact, I was never around any...till now."

"Well, I'm not one."

"Not yet. You'll get there."

"I gotta figure out what the hell to study first."

"Why choose? Study all of it."

"Please. I'm not Ally. I don't wanna be in school when I'm 45."

"I think it's great she's doing it."

"Yeah, I mean, I think it's good, too, she doesn't wanna be an interpreter anymore, not too much, anyway. She did a lot of years, she kind of killed her hands."

"I hope I don't kill mine. If I'm gonna do surgery, I need my hands."

"Sometimes mine get real weird, from being on the computer a long time...like if I stay on it all day or something, no breaks, I get real numb."

"Is that serious?"

"Doubt it. Langly and the prof complain about it all the time, but it doesn't seem to stop them."

"Carpal tunnel syndrome."

"The disorder of the early 21st century."

"I think the body has to evolve to adapt to computers, and it's not there yet."

"Better get there soon. Doesn't look like they're going away any time soon."

"Evolution...you know, they didn't even teach evolution in my high school. It was really bad. We've got all these parents who think anything other than the creation story is going to corrupt their kids or something."

"You're joking. No Darwin in your school?"

"Oh, God, it was pathetic. You wouldn't believe."

"And I thought my high school was lame."

"Where'd you go to high school?"

"Teaneck, New Jersey. Not exactly the most sophisticated place on the planet. Course, I never graduated."

"But you got your GED."

"Did. Had to."

"Lots of people don't, you know. I mean, half the girls in my graduating class, no diploma, they got pregnant before they graduated and dropped out. It's pathetic."

"How about Tracy?"

"Tracy dropped out a long time ago. She was in special ed, you know she's got problems, but after a while she didn't want to go anymore, and my mom said fine. Which was stupid. Tracy could be okay with some training."

"Your mom said it was okay? Christ, when I got kicked out of school, my mom went ballistic."

"Yeah, but your mom has education, doesn't she?"

"Yeah, she's got a master's in nursing. She does neonatal intensive care. I think she likes 'em small where they can't fight back."

"Maybe she's really good at it."

"She probably is. She's not the warmest person, in case you didn't notice."

"No, but maybe she's a lot different with her patients."

"Maybe." Never thought about that.

"Have you talked to her?"

God, I do NOT want to go here.

"Not recently. We don't have a lot to say to each other, you know?"

"But at least she wants to talk to you."

"Maybe."

"That's more than my mom wants to do." Now she looks bummed. Shit.

"I dunno. My dad wants me to go see her. I'm not ready to do that."

"Well, I could go with you."

"Thanks, but right now, I'm not up for that." Please get off the subject, Kelly. I hate this topic.

"Well, when you're ready, I'll come with you."

Since it will probably never happen, I'm not gonna worry about it.

We get brought our dinner-some kind of chicken for me that has all kinds of spice on it, a quiche with spinach and four kinds of cheese in it for Kelly. It's definitely smelling decent. And lots of rice on the side. And carrots and zucchini, which, believe it or not, are two veggies I think are great.

I'm not a picky eater. Part of my problem.

"Well? How's yours?" I ask her. Mine is pretty damn awesome.

"It's a long way from cheeseburgers in the Warrenton Diner." But she's grinning. She likes this part of her life.

I think it's funny that me, who is so poor I can't afford to pay attention, introduced her to this.

"So when is Dr. Scully supposed to have her baby?"

"Not sure. I think near the end of February. Mulderette number two. And a girl."

"They'll have two girls then."

"Yep."

"Think they'll have any more?"

"Let's put it this way: if it's up to Mulder, yeah. If it's up to Dr. Scully, I'd say, no way."

"Well, I think her word carries more weight. I mean, she has to do the work."

"Yeah, but it's Mulder's kid too...I dunno. I'd like to think dads have some rights in the world."

"Yeah. I miss mine. Like I said, he's really only my stepdad, and he had his problems, but he was really good to me. He loved me like I was his own. I wonder if things would be different if I still had him."

"Probably. It's like you change one little thing, everything changes completely."

"Well, there's certainly things I'd like to change...but then, there's things I wouldn't."

"What'd you change?"

"Well...for starters, what happened to me New Year's...and my mom being mad at me...and my mom being a drunk...and Tracy being messed up...and not having any friends in high school...and being poor...want me to go on?"

"No, that's okay. I got a lot of stuff I'd change, too."

"Like what?"

"Well, like my folks would be together...and I wouldn't have gotten sent to rehab...and I wouldn't have lived on the street...and I wouldn't have waited so fucking long to get my act together...which I really don't have together yet..."

"Michael, you're doing fine."

"Really? I don't think so. I'm still like, I have no clue what I'm doing. I mean, only thing I can say I'm sure about is you."

"Really?" She smiles, and she's blushing.

Oh God, she is so beautiful.

"I mean, I think I'd be happy just doing whatever was needed to do so you could be a doc and all that."

"Well, Michael, that's really nice...and I'm flattered...but you have to find something you like to do, too."

"I will."

"Good, because I have no intentions of supporting you."

Whoa.

"I meant financially."

"I figured that."

"I mean, I'll support whatever it is you want to do...I just...so many guys where I come from, it's like they work sometimes, but then they expect that as long as the woman's got work, they're entitled to take her money, and I don't buy that."

"Hey, you know I wouldn't do that!" I'm kind of insulted.

"I know...it's just that, it's really important to me...it's like I never saw couples be partners like, until now. It's like I would read about it, but I didn't see it till now. I mean, look at Juliet and Byers. They're both really smart people and they're equal and one doesn't lean on each other for everything."

"You'd be surprised."

"They both have jobs."

"Yeah, and they are real smart people. They got their problems, though. Like I think Juliet wants to get married real bad, but the prof, he's kind of sitting on the fence still. But they did move in together, so I guess that's progress."

"Ally and Langly seem pretty equal."

"Pretty much. She's a lot older than he is, and she was married before."

"She said that. Her husband died, that's how she got out here in the first place."

"And she's got all the money."

"Not true. I mean, she said Langly's not liking work a whole lot right now, and she said it was fine if he didn't want to stay, but he was like all weird about it, even though she thinks of it as his money, too."

"Yeah, but fact is, it WAS her money. She inherited it. And she doesn't even have to share it, at least that's what my dad says Virginia law is."

"But she does."

"Still. It's like, I think in a way he's insane, but in another way, I'm like, right on, brother. 'Cause I'm not sure I'd be real comfortable just taking my wife's money. When I didn't do anything to earn it."

"He's earned it. Ally's not exactly always a walk in the park. She can be very impatient and stubborn."

"You looked at him lately? Talk about earning it."

"Well, he's a handful, too. He whines a lot. That's one thing about you that I like. You don't whine a lot."

God, she must be the first person on the planet ever to say that.

"Think Byers is high-maintenance or low-maintenance?" She asks me.

"The prof? Hard to say. I think he's pretty low maintenance...but that's the problem. You can't tell with the prof. He's like so majorly interior. I think Juliet's low maintenance most of the time."

"I think so, too. She gets her point across, though."

"So what'm I?" I ask her.

"Hmm, that's a tough one...not sure. I know I've been high maintenance lately."

"Yeah, well, understandable."

And then she does something I really don't expect. She takes my hands in hers, right across the table.

"I'm so lucky."

She thinks she's lucky?!

I should be the one saying it.

God, she has no idea what a jerk I really am.

This scares the hell out of me.

"So, Kel? You were saying something when we came in, but you didn't say what it was."

"Uh...oh, yeah. It's like, you know..." she's blushing.

She's so cute.

"Well...it's like, sometimes I think, I really want to make love to you..."

She's really blushing now.

"And?" I would like to hear more, thank you very much.

Then she looks annoyed. "But it's like, when I think I'm ready to do it, the body won't let me."

Bummer.

So what do I say?

"Hey, we don't have to rush it."

"Thanks."

The waiter, who's had no other customers-it's getting pretty damn nasty outside-offers us dessert and he doesn't charge us. I'm stuffed, but oh man, he brings out this death by chocolate concoction...I have no willpower.
 

We're both gorged to the gills when we leave.

I figured I'd have to work an entire Tuesday to pay for that meal.

She can eat my Tuesday any time she wants.

I'm just praying the 'Stang doesn't get all testy. Cars have a way of knowing these things. Not that I'm paranoid about it or anything.

Getting up the hill is a challenge in this crap. The streets are like a sheet of ice. I wonder if my dad's there. His car is one hell of a lot better than mine in this.

No dad there when we reach the gate. Nobody there but the residents, who probably aren't going much of anywhere.

I got to write this article.

I kiss Kelly and tell her sorry, I got to work for a while, and she's like, it's cool, she has to study. But I'll come back and see her later, and she says okay.

God, that girl can kiss. It's like every time she kisses me, every nerve gets fired up.

Including a few unwelcome ones.
 

Langly's out in the office, jamming away on something.

"What's up, asshole?" I ask him by way of a friendly greeting.

"Trying to figure out what the fuck is happening over at the Fibbie palace. Another firing today. Ellen."

"Ellen, Ellen...oh, yeah. The amazon with the bratty kid."

"That would be Ellen."

"How's your big sis, fuckrag?"

He looks up and he looks kind of happy. "Hey, well, she's got better bloodwork, which is good. She's not like normal yet, but she's getting better...I stopped to see her after work. She doesn't look as bad."

"Hey, that's cool. So how's it feel to have your hair all gone?" I'm kidding him, of course-he's still got bunches of it.

He shrugs. "I'm getting used to it, I guess. My shoulders get cold."

"Life is tough."

"You have no idea."

"Looked at the stuff from Ally yet?"

"No, not really...working on this. Besides, that's your baby, isn't it?"

"Looks that way."

"Well, don't fuck it up, Junior."

I guess that's what passes for encouragement from your ersatz older brother.

Work time. Again.

END OF PART 65