Rating: PG

Summary: New kid. New problems. And pool at Mitch's.

Spoilers: Nah.
 

ALLY:

"You ready to head out and see Joan, then we'll catch the new Mulder?"

"Sure, whatever." He's been working all day, and he doesn't look up when I let myself into the offices.

Byers is doing some quick cleanup before getting back to Juliet. I've noticed he's gotten much more territorial about his weekends.

I consider this a positive trend.

Langly, on the other hand, is off somewhere in the Sargasso Sea of depression, about something he hasn't confided in me about.

I'm ready to head back to the house when I hear Byers ask Langly, very softly, if he's all right.

This elicits a spat "I'm fine!" from Langly.

Meaning, thank you for asking, I'm anything but.

Byers and I exchange a glance, and his says something to the effect of, glad he's your problem.

Thanks, Byers.
 

Joan is sitting up, for a change. And while she's not blooming with color, she looks better than she has in ages.

"That's because Julie did my hair," she smiles.

What is it about this family and hair? They're all stuck on their hair.

God, if I worried about mine, I'd be miserable all the time.

"I've got a lower white count," she smiles at her brother. "I think I can thank you for that." She takes his hand. "You're awfully quiet today, little one. What's up?"

"Nothing. Just tired, I think. Think they'll let you come home soon?"

"I have to get my CBC doing something resembling normal...then they'll let me out. I can't wait. I'm so sick of this place, I could scream."

"You're not the only one," Julie pipes in.

"Honey, you don't have to be here every moment, you know."

"I'm not. I worked all week."

"Yeah, how's that going?" Langly hasn't talked to his niece since the previous weekend. So far, she hasn't learned much, but not for lack of trying.

The place is a freaking fortress, judging from the way she's described it.

"Tell you about it later."

"Cool." But the voice is without enthusiasm.

"Ringo, Ally, thanks for stopping by...but to tell you the truth, I really could use some privacy. And a nap." She looks at her daughter. "That means you, too, Julie. Out."

"I'll be back later," she promises.

"Take your time." Joan's smiling, but her teeth are gritted. I wonder if her kids are driving her crazy. I know mine would if she was around that much while I was sick.

Ah, the joys of children.

And they are a joy...but sometimes...

"We gotta make another stop, anyway. Mulder and Scully just had kid number two."

"Oh, that's wonderful!" Joan barely knows them, but seems sincerely pleased. "Tell them congratulations."

"Yeah. See ya later, Joanie." He squeezes his sister's hand, and we're out of there.
 

Sarah Meighan Mulder is gorgeous. Whereas Rebecca is her father all over, this one is more of a combination. Lots of reddish-brown hair, bright blue eyes, pale skin...more like her mother, but you can see a lot of the dad in there, too.

I forget always how tiny they are at first. I can't believe Miranda was ever this small.

Of course, I didn't feel that way when I was trying to push her out.

For some reason, I have a memory of being in labor...and telling Eric I changed my mind, I didn't want to do this, I wanted to go home.

He and the midwife found this to be exceedingly amusing. Possibly because I was 9 centimeters dilated at the time, and having contractions less than two minutes apart.

I don't remember ever telling Eric that we were never having sex again-something apparently Dana has told Mulder before, during and after both births-but I do remember when he begged for a washroom break, I screamed at him that he'd better not leave me.

I also remember not being able to believe it was finally over-and seeing my daughter for the first time.

Dana looks pale and tired, but she's also grinning in a way you seldom see her do.

At least until her older daughter arrives with Grandma. Rebecca is screaming her head off-this situation has her totally screwed up. Well, Rebecca's still a baby herself, being only 16 months old, and she doesn't get it, and her father's attempts to placate her aren't working terribly well. Her mother's trying as well, but Rebecca isn't having it.

Salvation from the shriekling arrives in an unlikely form. Michael and Kelly trail along with Frohike, who's brought Dana a huge bundle of wildflowers, and apologies from Jo for not being able to make it until later.

When Rebecca sees Michael, she decides, okay, this is fine. She decides that he's going to play with her.

And say what you will about Michael, but for some reason, kids love him. Rebecca starts laughing when he picks her up and plays with her. And after a few minutes, she decides that Kelly's all right as well. Kelly really did well in approaching the child. She didn't rush her. She just stayed nearby and let Rebecca get used to her.

It occurs to me that these two just might someday make decent parents.

It's getting more and more crowded in here. Byers and Juliet have appeared, bearing gifts-elegantly wrapped, of course-and congratulating them happily.

The funniest part is when Byers sets eyes on Sarah. He's enchanted, completely. Dana asks him if he'd like to hold her-and he does. This gives me the opportunity to see a Byers I have not yet seen-and Juliet apparently notices it as well. Watching the two of them interact with the infant is a marvelous thing to see, a mirabile visus-and a little sad, too.

Langly and I won't have this opportunity together...

Hello, Allison! No wonder he's so bummed! Get it together, Miss Clueless!

Talk about having to be slapped on the head with a mallet.
 

MICHAEL:

We're on our way back to Chateau Langly and the offices from gawking at the new mini-Mulder. Cute kid. But her big sister is still my girl.

Well, my little girl.

Kelly's my girl, absolutely.

All of a sudden, she smacks her forehead and hisses out "shit!"

"What's wrong?" My dad and I both say it together-oh God, this scares me sometimes.

"I forgot I have a paper due in Comp on Monday, and I was so busy studying for my midterms I didn't even think about it! Shit!"

Dad glares at her a little-he doesn't like bad language in ladies.

"You want some help?" I ask her.

"Maybe proof it after I'm done. Damn, I am so STUPID!"

"Kelly, just do the paper and quit beating on yourself." Dad's talking. "You're not the first person who ever let an assignment slip her mind."

"I know, I know, I just-I'm so brain dead!"

"Okay, that'll do, young lady. You'll get it done."

"And I'll proof it for you," I offer.

"Thanks. I'd better get moving on it soon as we get back. I'm sorry, Michael, I completely forgot."

"Hey, what were we gonna do, hang out and catch a video? It's not like we had something major going on."

"I know, I know, I was just-you know, looking forward to relaxing tonight with you."

"I got the impression some of that went on last night," Dad butts in.

I am going to strangle him.
 

"You don't mind if me and Langly go and maybe shoot some pool?" I ask her.

"How am I supposed to mind? I'm the one who forgot she had a paper due!" She's down in the dungeon, booting up her computer.

"Okay. Well, I'll try not to be too late so I can proof your paper."

"You can do it tomorrow, even. I don't write fast like you do. Wish I had your talent." She's bummed.

She's nuts.
 

"Hey, fuckrag," I call to Langly, who's in the offices banging away. "Feel like losing some money?"

"What, I should give it to you?" He doesn't look up.

"I was thinking more like, we shoot some pool and you lose."

He looks at me, and I think I see him sort of smile. "Me, lose? I think you're delusional, Junior."

"Hey, just because you beat me on your wedding day doesn't mean you're that lucky all the time!"

I think he mutters something to the effect of, ain't that the truth?, but he's thinking this over.

"I could stand to acquire a little independent wealth...you're on, Junior."

"Cool. Kelly's got a paper she forgot about. You taking Ally?"

"Ally can't shoot pool to save her life...I mean, if she wants to go, that's fine, but I bet she won't."

He doesn't sound real happy with her right now.

We're alone, Dad and Byers aren't hanging around, so I ask him if he's mad at her.

"Nope."

"So what's your problem? She yelling at you more than usual, but still less than you deserve?"

"Nah. She's cool."

"So what the fuck's the matter with you?"

"Nothing! Now, lemme finish here so I can whip your sorry little ass."

He is BUGGED about something.
 

Ally's having a beer and making dinner. She asks me if I want one...

Did I just say no?

Weird.

So I ask her what's up with her old man, and she just looks real down.

"I don't really want to talk about it."

Well, you never do, Ally, so what else is new?

"He sure as hell is tetchy today."

"Uh-huh." She's avoiding me. "Michael, don't you have something to do?"

"Well, yeah..."

"So why are you in my kitchen?"

Guess he's not the only one that's tetchy here.

"Just wondered what was up with your useless husband, that's all. You mind if we go shoot some pool?"

No, that's cool." She's still not looking at me. "Uh...Michael? I don't mean to be the bitch that I am, but I really need to be alone right
now...okay?"

"Sure."

What the hell is wrong with these two?

Jesus.
 

"God, I hope we don't have to wait too long for a table," Langly's eyeballing the crowd at Mitch's-there're closer places to play, but Mitch has regulation tables, and he treats us right.

"C'mon, Mitch takes care of us. You wanna beer, asshole?"

"Yeah, okay." We cruise up to the bar, and Mitch is working. He sees us and yells out, "What're you assholes doing here?" Which, in Mitch-speak, is hello, long time no see. He puts two Buds in front of us...Mitch's is a biker bar, you don't get Sam Adams here. "Langly, you useless excuse for a human. Where's the lovely lady?"

"Home," he says grumpily.

"So what the fuck are you doing here?"

Langly jerks a thumb in my direction. "He dragged me here."

"Oh, yeah, I twisted your arm and held you at fucking gunpoint."

"That's right...you're Frohike's young'un. What, can't get a date?"

"Actually, my girlfriend is working on a paper for school." Why I tell him this instead of telling him to go fuck himself is beyond me.

"Well, in my opinion, they're both better off without you. So what's going on, Langly? How's life in civil service?"

"Sucks." Not exactly Mr. Talkative tonight, are we?

"Thought you liked being a spook."

"Fuck you, Mitch."

This makes Mitch throw back his head and roar. Mitch has a laugh you can hear three counties over. "Langly, what the fuck's with you? Old lady cut you off?"

He doesn't say anything.

Mitch slaps the bar. "Look, you wanna sulk, don't do it in my face, got it?"

"We're just waiting for a table."

"I'll get you a fucking table if you just get the goddamn puss off your face!" Mitch is barking at him, and everybody around can hear it. Mitch leans over and whispers-well, what's whispering for Mitch-"What the fuck's eating him?"

I shrug. Beats the fuck out of me.
 

I kill him first game. This does not make him a happy camper. He beats me the next two, though. I got to start winning some money back.

He's not very sociable tonight. Usually, Langly talks your ear until it's blue and ready to shrivel and die, but tonight, I bet I can count on both hands the number of words that've come out of the mouth that normally won't die.

He's got something chewing on his guts, and it'd be nice if he'd give little brother some credit for being a friendly listener and spit it out.

"You gonna tell me what your problem is?" I hassle him again as we chalk up for game 4.

"Why d'you think there's a problem?" He's beyond tetchy and moving fast towards hostile.

"Because usually we beg the gods for mercy to make you shut up and tonight you don't say shit."

"So?"

"And your wife wouldn't say shit, either."

"What the fuck were you doing asking her?"

"Just wondering, that's all."

"Uh-huh."

He is lousy company when he's in a bad mood. Tonight, he's in a REAL bad mood.

Fuck the cash. We're only playing 25 bucks a game, anyway.

"Okay, asshole," I tell him. "Here's the deal. I win, you tell me what the fuck is wrong with you. You win, I give you your money and it's fair."

He looks at me like I've lost my mind. "God, you really feel like donating tonight, don't you?"

Not really, but if he doesn't give it up soon, I'm leaving.

Course, we have Ally's car, this could be a problem.

"So are we playing?"

He shrugs. "We're playing." He probably figures he can ream me, no problem. He won the last two and probably thinks I had opener's luck.

Ha. He hopelessly miscalculates. Michael Frohike actually can play pool, thank you very much.

I don't think he was counting on losing this round, but he lost, fair and square, and now I'm gonna collect.

"This time for cash," I tell him. "But you still gotta pay from the last game."

"Jesus. Whatever."

We rack up the balls again.

"It's like...oh, fuck, forget it. It's not worth it."

"Not worth what, asshole?"

"It's like...okay, Mulder, he's got two kiddies now, right?"

"Yeah." What's this got to do with anything?

"And Byers and Juliet...I mean, you saw 'em today. Not much longer and they'll be spreading their DNA all over the place."

"Yeah? So?"

"And your dad has you and your sister, and someday you're gonna probably have your own kidlets, and Ally's got Miranda..."

"You got stuck with Miranda, too."

"Nah, it's not that. She's cool. Gives me somebody to argue with."

"Okay. And?"

"Well, guess what? I lost out in that sweepstakes."

Oh God, that's right. Ally's been snipped. Right after...

She lost hers and Langly's kid. Last year.

Oh man. He IS bummed.

"I'm real sorry, dude." What can you say.

"Yeah, well, it's not the worst thing that could happen, I'm just feeling sorry for myself."

And you do it so well, big brother. But I bite that one back.

"We had one shot, and it didn't take."

"Feeling a little gypped there?"

"Yeah...no, make that a lot. Yeah. It shouldn't bug me, but it does. Like I don't even have a shot at it again."

"Not your fault."

"Doesn't matter."

"So that's why you're mad at Ally."

"No, I'm not mad at Ally! She didn't want it like that anymore than I did. I think we both would've liked the chance to do it."

"That bites."

"Yeah, well, can't do anything about it now. I'll get over it."

Like hell he will.

"You know Kelly works for a fertility doc," I tell him.

He looks at me kind of strange. "You're saying what?"

"I'm saying maybe you guys oughta go see her."

Now he really thinks I've lost it, judging from the look on his face.

"You gotta be kidding."

"Then why the fuck would I have mentioned it?"

"I dunno, you do like torturing me, Junior."

"Yeah, it's the only joy I get in life, but even I know when to be useful."

"Wow, let me know when that happens."

"So why don't you?"

"Don't I what?"

"Why don't you guys go see her?"

He looks at me REAL skeptical like. "I dunno...the whole genetic engineering thing makes me real nervous...and Ally'd never go for it. No way."

"How the hell do you know? You ask her?"

"No. But she's got her kid...she's done it."

"But not with you."

"No, when she did it with me, coulda killed her." He's bitter, and he's only had two beers, so it's not liquor talking.

"So? Maybe it doesn't mean it couldn't go right again."

"Junior, she's been cut! Like no more! It's over for her. And she'd probably think she was too old, anyway."

"Maybe, maybe not. Why don't you ask her?"

"Because...it's like...it's something I want, and I'm not sure she wants it...and we had a deal."

"What's the deal?"

"That if it happened, cool...and if it didn't, well, it wasn't supposed to happen."

"Maybe she changed her mind. She was looking kinda sad when she saw the kidlet today."

"She did not."

"That's 'cause you were too busy feeling sorry for yourself to notice, you fuckrag!"

"Jesus, let a guy get kissed by a pretty girl a few times, he's an expert on relations!"

"Fuck you, Langly! I just said I saw her, that's all! Which you didn't because you were too damn busy being a selfish bastard!"

I let my mouth run too far again. Shit.

But he starts laughing. "Fuck, Junior, you do have a way of sticking it in and twisting it around. You learn that trick from your old man?"

"Whaddya mean?"

"Your dad does the same thing to me."

"He's a real royal pain in the ass, isn't he?"

"Yeah, but I'd be fucked without him."

"So what're you gonna do, you stupid fuck?"

He doesn't answer me for a long time.

Finally, when he wins this game, he asks me, "What's the name of this person Kelly works for?"

END OF PART 68