Caelum Prospexit Stellis Fulgentibus Aptum
 

MICHAEL:

Everyone bails out. Dad tells me he expects me to come home tonight.

The prof and Juliet left today; they moved into one of those corporate apartment places where you can stay for like a month or so. They put an offer in on a house. This amazes me. Byers and Juliet don't look at houses, they interview them. Everything that's wrong with a place, they can catalogue it in nauseating detail. And then they negotiate.

Somebody will retire from real estate soon.

I don't know. I like sleeping with Kelly. But Miranda wanted her bed back, and I think tonight, I'd rather be alone with my dad.

It's not like I'm gonna tell him what Kelly said to me. That'd just blow him out of the water. He'd freak totally. I'd like to tell him, but I don't need him having a screaming hissy.

I wish he wouldn't get so bent every time something goes between Kelly and me. I need him to listen, not to dictate and bitch.

So I won't say anything to him.

But I think I'd like a backrub.
 

Kelly and me hang for a while. We talk about stuff-med school, what I might wanna do, where we might live, how she misses her mom and Tracy, when we might get married, things like that.

God, if I had the money...would I do it now?

I might.

What if someone offered me work and money? Real work, real money. What would I do?

I don't know.

Besides, no one's gonna do that. So why even think about it? Deal in the real world, Frohike. You've got a ways to go.

And so does she. I tell her I want her to keep her dream of going to med school. That she's real smart, and she'll do good stuff. How she told me when she met me that she didn't want to end up like her mom. I want her to hold on to that.

She says when I met her I told her I didn't want to end up like my dad.

Is that still true?

In some ways, oh yeah. There're a lot of things he's done that I don't wanna do, and he doesn't want me to do them, either.

But there are other ways where I don't know that it's so bad to be like him.

He takes good care of everybody, and I want to be like him that way. He's so tough. He's been through a lot. But he's what Ally calls 'invictus maneo', which she says is Latin for 'I remain unconquered.'

He really is. I hope I can stay that way, too.

I tuck Kelly in and snuggle up next to her for a little while. She's so warm and soft. This is how I know I'm alive.

She starts falling asleep, and it's time for me to head on home.
 

Sometimes I don't think it will ever be cool again. It's still like 80 out, even though it's nearly 2 a.m. But it's a pretty night. Lots and lots of stars...reminds me of the first time I saw Kelly.

The world's a fucked-up place. But it's nice to know that when you look up and see the heavens, they're still beautiful and where they belong. Makes you feel like there's always a chance to get it right.

Ally says I can take her car tonight, but I damn better get mine fixed. I'll do that. But tonight, I just wanna get home and see my dad. I don't know why. I think I'll just feel better being with him.

You can smell all the night-blooming jasmine Ally's got planted. She says it reminds her of LA. Personally, it makes me sneeze, but it does smell nice. Now if I could just do something about my allergies...

And you can catch the scent of the roses my dad planted for them. My dad, as it turns out, is a damn good gardener. He used to do it when I was little back in Jersey, but I figured he'd been away for so long he'd lost his touch.

Nah. These guys are really good-looking and have a great fragrance. He planted mostly whites and reds for them. And right now, they're all in bloom. I'm always tempted to pick one for Kelly, but I know if I do, I'll kill it. And I don't wanna do that. Better to go to them and admire them. Is that supposed to be profound? I don't think so.

When these guys first moved here, Byers gave them some hyacinth, and Dad and Ally planted them. Now they've gone nuts and multiplied over the place. Talk about a jungle.

And it's funny. I never think about stuff like this. But at 2:00 a.m, when everything's quiet and you're all alone, you see things a little differently.

Wait a minute. I get the feeling I'm not all alone.

I feel my skin prick up.

Nah, I had to be imagining it. Nobody's here.

Although I could have sworn I smelled bad cigarettes.

Fuck it. I'm going home.

END OF BOOK 3
 

But don't go away! Book 4, 'Dum Spiro, Spero' is on its way...but I really have to get home now. Check your mailboxes tomorrow!

Love, Michael